Why Interviewing is Basically Dating

Before I met my boyfriend, I really hated dating. All of the anticipation, anxiety and doubt of trying to find someone really into me was not something I was much of a fan of. In short, I pretty much think dating sucks, but it is an art—and it’s an art that can be mastered. If you master the dating world, you’re bound to find someone you’re meant to be with somewhere down the line.

As 2015 is heading into the fall, I’ve been on about seven interviews during this year, and in my seven interviews I’ve realized one thing: interviewing is pretty much the same thing as dating. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t think interviewing sucks. In fact, I’m beyond grateful for every interview I’ve had the opportunity to attend, but there are some striking parallels between the two.

1. You want to look interested, but you don’t want to come off as desperate

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Hey, so, I really would like you to hire me because I would sell my kidney to work for this awesome company, but I’m not needy. I swear.

2. You have to dress the part because first impressions matter

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Look at me I’m professional, much business casual!

3. Some interviews are really uncomfortable, just like some first dates

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We have all had an awkward date or an awkward interview. Flat out, they’re awful. At least it’s a way to figure out you wouldn’t be the right fit for the company’s mission anyway. Just like I wasn’t the right fit for the guy who had a tattoo of a magician’s face on his right shoulder.

4. And some interviews feel really natural

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I love a conversational, comfortable interview. You’re excited to be in the interviewer’s presence, and they’re excited to have you! It’s just good energy all around.

5. But you still don’t end up getting the job and you can’t understand why

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That interview seemed to go so well, just like that one really great date you had. Yet, neither of them called you back, and it definitely stings at first, but you get through it.

6. Some interviews make you realize “I don’t think I want to work here after all.”

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It’s just like how some first dates allow you to realize the person is a train-wreck before you get too deeply involved. Sometimes not getting the job is a bullet dodged.

7. And some interviews have you leaving with hearts in your eyes

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And just like going on a date with the guy or girl of your dreams, you know they’re the one, sort of how you know a job would be perfect for you! This company is where you belong. These people are YOUR people!

8. After the interview comes the waiting game

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Most times after a date you have to play whatever dumb rules exist in the dating world. This is pretty similar in the working world. It’s very rare that you’ll get hired on the spot. Typically they give it a few days or even a week before they let you know that you da one.

9. Sending out thank you emails is just like sending out that “I had a great time last night” text

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You’re really eager to let them know you’re grateful for the opportunity, and you had an awesome time. On one hand, it is proper etiquette, but there’s a fine line between looking appreciative and desperate!

10. And when you don’t hear back, your anxiety doubles

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You did the right thing sending that email, but it can make you feel really unsure when the email doesn’t solicit a response. Not to worry though, professional people can be pretty busy. It doesn’t mean they don’t appreciate the gesture, or that they aren’t interested in you.

11. Sometimes you get too antsy and decide to contact your interviewer before they contact you

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This could go horribly wrong, but you need closure! This is the same after a date when you wonder, “So did they like me or not? I need to know!”

12. And sometimes you set yourself up to get rejected on the spot

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In this situation, it did go horribly wrong, but at least you can move on with your job hunt, or love hunt, or whatever.

13. Or you might be pleasantly surprised to find out they were just getting ready to contact you with an offer!

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This is a deep sigh of relief; you got the job after all! All of the stress and anxiety wasn’t worth your time. It turns out they were feeling you from the beginning! This is just like the guy or gal or was playing the 3-day-rule before they contacted you! Sometimes, it really just takes time.

14. Either way, if you didn’t land the job, you’ve learned some valuable tips and lessons to take on your next interview

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When you have a series of ups and downs in the dating world, you (hopefully) learn from them. It’s the same thing in the search for the perfect job. You learn from your interviewers, about yourself and what you really want from a job or career. So fear not, you win some and you lose some; that’s truly just life. But In the end, you might score an amazing internship or job like I scored an amazing boyfriend and some awesome work opportunities along the way! Never give up on your job or love hunt, the perfect opportunity might be closer than you think.

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