I’m Back: Twenty-three with a Degree

Never mind that I actually turn 24-years-old next week, but I finished my last undergraduate quarter and walked in Commencement this past weekend.

So what does this mean? More life updates, more insights and finally more content. I’m back and I’m more comfortable in my skin than ever. What at true joy it is to complete your education in something you’re so passionate about. Communication changed my life and I can’t wait to fill you in on it soon!

Temporary Hiatus + Side Blog Project

I know it has been a scary long time since I actually sat down and published something (I’m like Prince with a secret vault except mine is full of crappy posts), but I am officially on a temporary hiatus until early summer. In the mean time, I ask that you check out my side blog project on the golden age of the Simpsons, an era which is my favorite in all of television history.

thegolddonut.wordpress.com

Life has been chaotic and busy with this whole GRADUATING COLLEGE thing, so I promise to get some content out before Trump becomes president and this whole world burns (kidding? I don’t even know anymore).

When it all settles down, depending on how this Simpsons project works out, I hope to be able to coordinate the management of both blogs along with my new and fantastic position I’ve accepted after college. More details on that are coming soon, I promise!

 

Kylo Ren is Probably an INFJ

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My key word here is probably, so don’t try to lightsaber fight me in a snowy forest just yet. My other key word here is TURN AROUND NOW IF YOU DON’T WANT SPOILERS! Well, that was more a phrase, but seriously stop reading NOW.

*SPOILERS AHEAD, EITHER SCROLL REALLY FAST OR EXIT YOUR BROWSER*

See? Look how considerate I am. ~~*Simply INFJ Things*~~

Anyway, moving on, I’m pretty sure Kylo Ren, or Kylo BEN (ha ha ha, see what I did there?) is most likely an INFJ and here’s why:

1.) He has a classic case of INFJ Rage™

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One time I flipped over a table as a child because I was so mad my mom snuck out of the house without telling me. This was basically Ren acting like a mega-baby who can’t control his Fe very well. At least my excuse is that I was 6 years old.

2.) He has deep Ni intuition 

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*Kylo Ren and Supreme Leader Snoke discuss Rey in the novel*
“This girl—resisted you?”
“Completely untrained, but strong with the Force. Stronger than she knows.”

Ren’s intuition and keen focus on Rey’s gift is much more pronounced than that of Leader Snooki’s. INFJ’s pick up on everything, after all.

3.) He can emotionally manipulate the crap out of you

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Call it EQ, or call it emotionally torturing people to get what you want out of them, Ren is smart, but he’s not resting on logic to get there.

4.) He’s extremely idealistic and visionary

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This whole mission is intended to honor what good ol’ Grandpa Vader started. Ren is entirely blinded by his vision of the First Order (whose name reminds me of New Order, who is also one of my favorite bands because INFJness).

5.) Ya know, Hitler and Osama Bin Laden were INFJ’s too.

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INFJ’s who embrace toxicity and the dark side can become almost unstoppably evil. Look at Hitler or Bin Laden. These figures in history were so convinced by their beliefs that they weren’t above murdering and torturing humans to make them a reality: Ren is no different.

6.) He’s kind of an evil monster, but he’s also really human

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When Ren takes off the mask to show Rey what’s underneath, he’s just a kid. He’s a young Marilyn Manson looking kid with emotions, goals, angst and a whole lot of anger. By the way, MM is an INFJ too.

7.) And he’s surprisingly soft-spoken and sensitive underneath the mask

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…Or he’s just a whiny, teary-eyed, emotional bastard. You decide.

8.) He abandoned his family in order to resist an emotional connection to them

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…And yet he STILL does! INFJ’s are deeply connected to their loved ones. Deep down he knows he still loves Daddy Solo, which is what leads me to my next point:

9.) He can easily make a decision and never turn back, also known as the INFJ Door Slam™

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He had to stab his dad and push him down a shaft just to eliminate their bond and the pull he felt toward him. The worst part is that he won’t regret this decision either. Solo, you’ve been cut, literally and figuratively.

10.) At one point, he still felt the pull to good

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“Forgive me. I feel it again… the call from light. Supreme Leader senses it. Show me again, the power of the darkness, and I’ll let nothing stand in our way. Show me… and I will finish what you started.”

Even when INFJ’s are being evil, they don’t feel they’re being evil. Their moral compass enters a state of total conviction which enables justification for their actions, but his still experienced doubt for good chunk of the film.

While it’s way too soon in the trilogy to come to a definite conclusion on this, it’s what I’m betting on so far. So, who knows, I could be wrong—and there’s a gigantic chance of that—but I’m ready to bet on it for now, and as an INFJ myself, I can see myself coming and going from a mile away.

Scott Weiland is Dead and No One is Glorifying Him

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Less than a week after Scott Weiland’s death, his second wife penned an open letter to him on behalf of his still young children. The piece was quickly labeled “poignant” and “powerful” with Mary Forsberg Weiland described as “brave,” so many people heartbroken for her.

While I have sadness and empathy in my heart for Scott Weiland’s children, dealing with his death at the tender ages of 15 and 13 must be especially difficult, I have little sympathy for Mary Forsberg, and I’m here to tell you why.

I’m the unfortunate child of an addict. A life I was born into which I didn’t choose. When I read the Rolling Stone article, I was almost angry by Forsberg’s callousness and lack of accountability. Who decided to marry and bring two children into the world with a publicly-known and destructive addict? Who is now assuming the role of martyr?

I also want to know who exactly is glorifying Scott’s death? If anything, most of us have pity for him. I do. I’ve grown up with his music—a wonderful artist that fucked up and was fucked up.

I pity his wonderful talent gone to waste. I pity his substance abuse. I pity his lack of fatherhood. I pity his destructive relationships in both platonic and romantic situations.

Rumors are flying about both sides of the story: Mary onced used heavy drugs like heroin and cocaine, Scott paid $60,000 per month in child support, Mary refused to let Scott see his kids, Scott committed spousal abuse on Mary.

And still, in all of this, it’s the children that suffer the most.

To Scott and Mary’s kids:

It will be okay, but you have to make it okay. Your parents short-comings don’t define you. You’ll experience the pain from it for the rest of your life, but it will be okay. Try to treasure the good memories you had, if any. Don’t let hate fill your heart.

To Scott:

I’m sorry you had this disease. I’m sorry you couldn’t be the father you needed to be. I’m just sorry. And I won’t glorify your rockstar life. I promise.

5 Ways to Enjoy Halloween Without Being a Jerk

Halloween is surely a magical time of the year: Pumpkins, scary movies, costumes and candy are just a few of the many reasons Halloween is a much loved tradition. Unfortunately, with Halloween comes the temptation to do the wrong thing, but fear not! I’m here to help you figure out the basics of having a happy, safe and controversy-free Halloween.

1. Don’t dress up like other races

Seriously, it’s not cool to paint your face another skin color, and it’s definitely not cool to dress up as a stereotype. Caricatures of someone else’s culture are both unfair and offensive. It’s okay to be a person of color you really like for Halloween, but don’t mock them by trying to change your physical appearance to match theirs. Study some classic Hollywood history, and you’ll see just how wrong black-face, brown-face and the like are.

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(https://westsidescholar.files.wordpress.com)

2. Be careful who you’re taking photos with

You probably don’t want a picture of you and the most offensive costume of the night all over social media. After all, the internet is forever, just like my insatiable need to write list-formated blogs. We all remember this photo with Taylor Swift—please be smarter than Swifty.

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(http://www.dailystormer.com/)

3. Don’t drink and drive

This is an easy one, but it’s unfortunately rarely followed. Do not drink and drive on Halloween. I’m serious. Call a cab, an Uber or find a DD. As with any major party holiday, it’s a horrible idea to get behind the wheel after you’ve just had a night of drinking. Not only are you more likely to get busted for it (you shouldn’t be doing it anyway), you could really hurt someone, you know, like those kids out trick-or-treating trying to have a fun, harmless night.

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(http://img.pandawhale.com)

4. Don’t dress up like Caitlyn Jenner.

Seriously, this one just isn’t funny. Whatever your feelings on the Jenners/Kardashians may be, it’s not fair—or right—to make fun of someone’s trans journey. To many people, including myself, Jenner is a hero of transgender awareness and progress. So, get out of my realm with your ridiculousness.

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(lockerdome.com)

5. Don’t vandalize anything

Keep the egging, window breaking, slashing of tires and other mindless destruction out of here. As adults, it’s definitely time to know better, and you don’t have the right to ruin anyone’s Nov. 1 because you decided to be a terrible person on Oct. 31

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(http://www.excusememe.com)

So with that, please have a wonderful Halloween weekend, and remember, make good choices!

Thank You + Gratitude

This isn’t a big fancy post. It isn’t going to have GIFs or anything of that nature (Okay, maybe one.) I’m not going to spend days (or weeks) on it like I usually do. Instead, I’d like to make a quick thank you to everyone who has been reading or visiting my blog; I appreciate all the likes and comments. I truly need your feedback, as I just want to make my writing and content better. After all, what’s the point of writing if there’s no audience?

Do I write this blog for me? Partly. Do I write this blog for you? Absolutely. Having this blog helps me in so many ways, but at the end of the day, it’s for you guys, Internet. So rejoice, because I love you!

I wanna write down a couple nouns that have been super important to me over the last 9 months. After all, I’ve been through more than enough changes to count.

  • Gratitude
  • Humility
  • Grace
  • Kindness
  • Adventure
  • Maturity
  • Creativity
  • Ambition
  • Perseverance 
  • Guts
  • Confidence
  • Research
  • Patience
  • Persistance 
  • Dogs
  • Seinfeld

Have a wonderful rest of the week and weekend. I’m going to be busy, but who knows, I might post something silly and ridiculous soon if I feel the inspiration. I go back to school soon, and I cannot wait. I also have sent some applications for internships and jobs in my field, and I’m going to remain super optimistic about it!

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(GIF credit 2 Drake and Giphy)

xoxo,

Gossip Girl.

Kidding.

Why Interviewing is Basically Dating

Before I met my boyfriend, I really hated dating. All of the anticipation, anxiety and doubt of trying to find someone really into me was not something I was much of a fan of. In short, I pretty much think dating sucks, but it is an art—and it’s an art that can be mastered. If you master the dating world, you’re bound to find someone you’re meant to be with somewhere down the line.

As 2015 is heading into the fall, I’ve been on about seven interviews during this year, and in my seven interviews I’ve realized one thing: interviewing is pretty much the same thing as dating. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t think interviewing sucks. In fact, I’m beyond grateful for every interview I’ve had the opportunity to attend, but there are some striking parallels between the two.

1. You want to look interested, but you don’t want to come off as desperate

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Hey, so, I really would like you to hire me because I would sell my kidney to work for this awesome company, but I’m not needy. I swear.

2. You have to dress the part because first impressions matter

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Look at me I’m professional, much business casual!

3. Some interviews are really uncomfortable, just like some first dates

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We have all had an awkward date or an awkward interview. Flat out, they’re awful. At least it’s a way to figure out you wouldn’t be the right fit for the company’s mission anyway. Just like I wasn’t the right fit for the guy who had a tattoo of a magician’s face on his right shoulder.

4. And some interviews feel really natural

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I love a conversational, comfortable interview. You’re excited to be in the interviewer’s presence, and they’re excited to have you! It’s just good energy all around.

5. But you still don’t end up getting the job and you can’t understand why

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That interview seemed to go so well, just like that one really great date you had. Yet, neither of them called you back, and it definitely stings at first, but you get through it.

6. Some interviews make you realize “I don’t think I want to work here after all.”

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It’s just like how some first dates allow you to realize the person is a train-wreck before you get too deeply involved. Sometimes not getting the job is a bullet dodged.

7. And some interviews have you leaving with hearts in your eyes

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And just like going on a date with the guy or girl of your dreams, you know they’re the one, sort of how you know a job would be perfect for you! This company is where you belong. These people are YOUR people!

8. After the interview comes the waiting game

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Most times after a date you have to play whatever dumb rules exist in the dating world. This is pretty similar in the working world. It’s very rare that you’ll get hired on the spot. Typically they give it a few days or even a week before they let you know that you da one.

9. Sending out thank you emails is just like sending out that “I had a great time last night” text

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You’re really eager to let them know you’re grateful for the opportunity, and you had an awesome time. On one hand, it is proper etiquette, but there’s a fine line between looking appreciative and desperate!

10. And when you don’t hear back, your anxiety doubles

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You did the right thing sending that email, but it can make you feel really unsure when the email doesn’t solicit a response. Not to worry though, professional people can be pretty busy. It doesn’t mean they don’t appreciate the gesture, or that they aren’t interested in you.

11. Sometimes you get too antsy and decide to contact your interviewer before they contact you

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This could go horribly wrong, but you need closure! This is the same after a date when you wonder, “So did they like me or not? I need to know!”

12. And sometimes you set yourself up to get rejected on the spot

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In this situation, it did go horribly wrong, but at least you can move on with your job hunt, or love hunt, or whatever.

13. Or you might be pleasantly surprised to find out they were just getting ready to contact you with an offer!

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This is a deep sigh of relief; you got the job after all! All of the stress and anxiety wasn’t worth your time. It turns out they were feeling you from the beginning! This is just like the guy or gal or was playing the 3-day-rule before they contacted you! Sometimes, it really just takes time.

14. Either way, if you didn’t land the job, you’ve learned some valuable tips and lessons to take on your next interview

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When you have a series of ups and downs in the dating world, you (hopefully) learn from them. It’s the same thing in the search for the perfect job. You learn from your interviewers, about yourself and what you really want from a job or career. So fear not, you win some and you lose some; that’s truly just life. But In the end, you might score an amazing internship or job like I scored an amazing boyfriend and some awesome work opportunities along the way! Never give up on your job or love hunt, the perfect opportunity might be closer than you think.